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Posted by on Oct 3, 2007

Pictures and conflicting emotions

Sorting through these pictures from Dublin and Venice,

anticipating the next more and more,

I received an email

from a friend

who had just married in Seoul.

And I was not there.

His pictures went like a thief

into my heart

and stole the anticipation.

They left me conflicted

and I remembered

that was Korea for all those years.

It was conflict of emotion, a bitter, beautiful conflict

between head and heart, heart and home,

my best friends’ wedding I couldn’t attend,

the joy on their faces, their bated breath as

they whisper into each other’s ear,

those toothy grins,

my conspicuous absence.

He couldn’t attend my wedding

for the same reason,

but being Romantics,

we both understood.

Perhaps it was better that way,

fodder for a future story.

And yet,

in the perfect focus of adulthood,

I sadly smile

thumbing through these pictures

of their perfect day,

and stories are the furthest thing

from my mind.

I just husband

this wonderfully complex

melancholy

for this lonely hour

of darkest morning;

my

heart

drifts

towards Seoul

once

again

like a

supple tree

in

the

monsoon

wind.
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